06.04.04 - 2:27 p.m.

Boys are too much crap to deal with. if it weren't for the cock, i would be sooooo out of here.

anyways, life is trucking along. I have all these things to do, and really, all I want is to lie down and take a nap. I mean it,...

I wake up at 6am. I know, some people consider that prime time. I consider it torture. I used to love my leasurely morning... taking the cup of coffee with me to the bath, waking up slowly, playing with the cats, paying some bills, maybe putting some food in a bag so i don't starve over the day, or spend the meagre allowance my supervisor gives me on overpriced cafeteria food. nowadays, the last guy i was dating got me into the habit of waking up at 6am, and i can't seem to break myself of the habit. and i am so cranky at that hour, that i just get up, get dressed and leave for work.

once at work, i'm attached to the umbilical cord of email, and end up responding to 10 or so, doing something useful for a few minutes, answering another half dozen emails, etc etc.....

in between i do stuff which sounds exciting, but in actuality, is pretty mundane. I can make it sound like I'm a super hero though: picture me with "I can genotype YOUR DNA" plastered across my chest.... okay, I'm only playing with this fantasy if I get the lasso of truth (which i think I would get more use out of in my life than wonderwoman ever did) and mind reading capabilities.

i set up reactions, stare into my lab notebook for inspiration, run data through various statistical hoops, all in a vain attempt to make data make sense. The big picture of my work, i do sincerely love. the smaller, more frustrating aspects on a bad day can make me cry. and i'm not that girly. i've seen the boys cry too, so i don't feel that bad.

I get home sometimes for 6pm, if I plan on doing a quick turnaround and returning to the lab that night.... most nights I'm here till 9 or 11pm.

thats a long day. i get home, pet the cats, have sex if the boy is waiting for me (if he has gone home, tired of waiting for me, then i only have sex if I'm energetic enough to walk the couple of minutes down the road to his place)

see what i mean about needing a nap? i should just string a hammock up in my office.

�

�

fucked up before - fucked up after